"Bags of bones, eyeballs and teeth looking for new ways to die."

Well. Minus the teeth.

That's a Terry Pratchett character's description of sheep, but it works quite well for chickens. Also, looking for new ways to scare the shit out of me.

Chicken: "I'm dying! I'm dying! Aaaaaaaaaaaargh! I'm dy-"
Me: "OMG SHIT WHAT DO I DO WILL THE HAGLEY ROAD VETS BE ABLE TO FIT ME IN HELP?!?!?!?!?!?!"
Chicken: "LOL! Not really. Also, you just put your hand in poo."
Me: "...goddammit."

I don't really recommend looking at galleries of normal and abnormal chicken poops when you're having your breakfast, but apparently the orangey gooey ones are normal. They just come from the caecum (dead end next to the appendix) rather than the rest of the intestines. Well, hooray.

Also there was blood on last night's food bowls, in a position that suggested a hen with a bleeding foot had been perching on the edge and scratching at stuff. This is worrying because chickens instinctively peck red things, so if one of them's bleeding, the others are guaranteed to make it worse. But I examined them all this morning and nobody seemed to have any fresh injuries, and there was no blood in the coop. So I guess someone just had a little scratch or peck.